Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Vegeterians and Right to Life

Funny how things come together. I sit as a panelist in arbitration cases for disputes between auto insurance companies. I do this once a month for half a day and get a free meal out of it. That and some time away from the desk, which is a boomerang kind of reward, seeing as all the crap I wasn't doing that morning is just going to be waiting for me.

Every auto insurance company that does business in Maryland is supposed to contribute employees to work as panelists once a month, but the hearing I attend is mostly people I know from my own employer with only a few from other companies.

The most recent of these panels somehow go on to the topic of whether a breakfast burrito that includes eggs is vegetarian. I thought it might not be, being as its an animal, albeit one that hadn't hatched, that's being consumed. One of the other panelists from another company insisted it was ok to eat eggs as a vegetarian. Vegetarians only leave out meat. Eggs aren't meat. Going to the point of no eggs or any other animal product is vegan.

Seems kinda deceptive to me, what with the name vegetarian suggesting only vegetables are being consumed but makes no real difference to me. To help remember, I came up with the simple rule that if it didn't take a breath, it's not meat.

And then I got to thinking. Vegeterians are like how the law used to be before the Right to Life crowd started changing the laws, post Roe v Wade. For the entirety of Western history a human being was not a human being until born. No one celebrates the date of their conception. Until recent weirdness, no one held funerals for miscarried fetuses. Basically, the way human procreation was created was that if it didn't take a breath, it wasn't a person.

Which made me wonder. If the Right to Life forces succeed in having the law declare that human life begins at conception, then all life has to begin at conception. After all, human life is a biological function similar to or the same as all other biological beings on this Earth. That would mean that a chicken is a chicken while it's still an egg. Ergo, ipso facto, Right to Life will have ended the age old philosophical question of which came first, the chicken or the egg. Quite simply, they were immaculately conceived and came into being simultaneously because the chicken and the egg are interchangeable.

Of course, if someone serves you an egg when you ordered chicken, you're out of luck. They're the same thing.

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