Nonlinear Dying

As invasive species go, stink bugs kind of suck. Unlike other invasive species, like humans and honey bees, they're entirely detrimental. All they do is eat crops and emit odor. And their population keeps increasing because nothing in the Western hemisphere eats the blighters.

So I do my part by killing them whenever possible. I don't find their stink so offensive to put off killing. At worst it's a smell of damp socks. Most of the time there's no smell at all.

The most irritating thing about them, other than that they get into the house in large numbers, is that they're erratic. They can't fly worth a damn and just veer into you. Even in death, the damn things go off in wild directions. More often than not, when I whack one with the fly swatter, the thing doesn't just drop with gravity. It goes off at some angle and disappears somewhere to be found some time later.

The only good stink bug is a dead stink bug.